If you don’t like it – change it. But how?

If you don’t like it – change it. But how?

Hello there!
How are YOU today?
I’m annoyed with myself.
I ate chocolate again.
Even though I said to myself this morning, 
“No chocolate for you today, Mrs.”
I could qualify that, and tell you it wasn’t a box of Maltesers, 
or even a bag.
Nope it was a mere handful of mint Aero thingies.
All air, tied together with a bit of chocolate.
But that’s not the point.
I’m annoyed because of my lack of will power, 
my inability to say no. 
And that is EVERY DAY,
about so many things, and at so many different levels. 
Of all the Wednesday blogs I have written and you have read, 
I bet more people can relate to this than anything.
Every day I say I won’t eat bread, butter or chocolate.
Guess what I do every day. 
And I wonder why my jeans aren’t getting any looser. 
I know I could go to Slimming World or Weightwatchers,
but SURELY! I should be able to lay off the chocolate!
Maybe the secret of Slimming World is the Commmunity Support.
Let’s face it, our little Blogging Community is pretty powerful, 
so I’m guessing it’s the same principle.
Maybe when we make public our intention,
share our progress,
we feel more motivated than if we are dealing with it alone. 
I do also know that if I can SEE progress, it spurs me on. 
So it’s just a question of making the choice. 
RIGHT. That’s it. From NOW.
I choose not to eat chocolate, bread or butter. 
Just for Today. 
Exercise? Did I hear you say exercise?? Steady!!!
One thing at a time!!!!
Another habit I have developed which I really ought to address 
is Facebook.
Spend way too much time on my Ipad,
when I could be reading a book or drawing a picture. 
And I know it’s not only me, because when I turn up,
there you all are !!!!
Right. who’s with me?
Hands up.
Who will stay away from bread, butter, chocolate 
AND Facebook for the rest of the day?
Am I alone?
Tea’s allowed…
If you always do what you always did,
you’ll always get what you always got. 
Surely I can stick to this until I go to bed???
love and hugs,
PS If you think chocolate is an inane problem,
replace the word chocolate above with your own particular 
flavour of addiction.
It’s all part of the same process…..

68 thoughts on “If you don’t like it – change it. But how?

  1. I have found certain things trigger bad habits for me, weirdly these things are chocolate and bread! (plus sugar) So I have cut them out – I have to do all or nothing, can't just allow myself a small piece. Done 5 days so far and got a LOOOOONG way to go. I motivate myself by planning al the nice clothes I will wear when I reach my goal. Just spent 2 hours sorting out my wardrobe and am feeling very determined after revisiting all the lovely things I have that I can't wear.. hey ho we will get there.

  2. Don't do Facebook so can't join you on that one! Now chocolate, that's a different story. Now I could pretend to be really good and say I will not eat another piece tonight……………but truth is I can't eat any as its all gone!! Apart from chocolate my only other vice is a certain craft company and their super amazing products…………………..you wouldn't want me to give that up, would you? Xx

    1. Hi Donna now that's a really good addiction – Clarity that is not chocolate! Teaching and chocolate do go hand in hand I'm afraid – I used to wrap a certain bar of chocolate up for one of the teachers I worked with and hide it in her cupboard so if she was particularly stressed she had a secret ( or not so secret stash!). Mind you she hasn't eaten chocolate foe over a year now – she still gas stress but has found will power! Xxx

  3. Having just recently been diagnosed with type 2 diabetes I'm trying to change my eating habits , cutting out white bread, sugar, chocolate and all things sweet! I'm trying to avoid taking yet more tablets in my daily dose and so it's a strict eating plan for me. I tell myself every day I'm reeducation get my eating habits not dieting. I do have the odd bit of cake but you are allowed a small treat now and then X good luck everybody with whatever your giving up x

  4. Sounds familiar! I've been through this so many times in the past – chocolate, cake, sweeties you name it any kind of naughty confection – I was there. UNTIL I made a decision NOT to ban anything. That sets us up for failure – then we hate ourselves. Vicious circle.
    I don't do FB, but I do spend far too much time on the computer. Perhaps that needs to change. Everything in moderation is fine, so I've heard.
    Tonbridge Sue

    1. Totally agree with you Sue about not banning things. I can go for weeks or months where I don't buy chocolate, cakes, biscuits etc and I don't miss them. But every now and then I will buy a treat and enjoy it. Knowing I could have it, is so different to saying I can't have it………… human nature at its best or is it worse.

  5. I'm just off to Slimming World! Have promised myself I can open my duty free chocolate when I come back. He not had any all week as I've been trying to lose the 3.5 lb I put on on holiday. Trouble is I know I wint be going next week as its my birthday week and will be meeting up,with friends next weds! So ice got two weeks in theory to

    1. Screen froze again in this iPad!! I do tend to have an addictive personality – not really admitted this in public before ….. A party from Clarity goodies there is something else that I'm fighting with at the moment so your blog has come at the right time for me and might help me to think it through…… Sorry for mistakes I dRe not go back and correct or the iPad will feeeE again!!!!

      Good luck with the rest of the evening but don't beat yourself up, you'll do it properly when you are ready….. AND isn't it Mother's Day for you?? Xxx

  6. Barbara that's so true, trying to do it alone is the hardest way, the bigger the support network around you the easier, in relative terms, it is to achieve your goal. Especially if they are also giving up something. Somehow you gain strength and willpower from your support network, and fellow givinupers. And sharing, no matter what it is or who you share it with, that also gains you strength. I'm not allowed bread and butter because of allergies, but I've been having wee treats of banned foods with Nicola as wee nice things in amongst the dreadful that I'm going through just now. Chocolate I'm not eating much of just now. Can I be excused for now please, I can't think what else I could give up just now with you? For me right now it's kind of the opposite, what I should be doing but can't, like craft, and not overdoing it physically, not stressing out and being upset so much. I'll be sending you psychically my willpower and support to help you out. Good luck to you and everyone who's going to do it with you. By the way you do need to regularly share your progress, good and bad, or it doesn't work, I know that from personal experience. Love Brenda xx

    1. Hi Brenda – enjoy your little treats! Reading your posts has inspired me to become a befriender for people who are really isolated or alone – I'm just waiting for my referees to do their part and I'll start my training. Thank you, and take care X

  7. I don't do face book so that's 1tick have got diabetes 2 so don't have brown bread on a daily basis 2nd tick as a treat I eat a baby packet of white buttons but not daily so 3rd tick
    But I'm part of the CCA fall of the wagon group who follow you on here so that's good
    Enjoy been yourself Barbara that's what's important
    Crafting hugs to all xxx

    1. Hi Sheila. As long as you put a cushion down before you fall off that wagon you will be fine! Right knee is fine now, left knee has still got a bruise on it but it's spread out wards and is more of a shadow – think we would have to go with lighter colours, perhaps spun sugar with a touch of juniper adirondack ! Enjoy your evening xxxx

  8. I'm with you Barbara this is my last Facebook entry for the day, bread and butter no problem but can I have my medicinal piece of 85% cocoa chocolate it's only 1 inch square and it's for my memory lol..x

  9. I'm with you Barbara this is my last Facebook entry for the day, bread and butter no problem but can I have my medicinal piece of 85% cocoa chocolate it's only 1 inch square and it's for my memory lol..x

  10. I totally agree with you about chocolate and facebook. I comfort eat and have turned to chocolate too much, this year in particular. Maria has set a wonderful example but I've got no willpower, I'm going to try though, maybe you could remind me tomorrow 🙂 And as for facebook, when my internet has conked out I get so much more done but it's nice to have a bit of company as I'm on my own most of the day. Barbara, I think you are slim, so I was very surprised that you are cutting down anyway. Be kind to yourself xxx

  11. I probably do spend too much time on Facebook but on a good note I have made some good friends and got back in touch with a very good old friend. I reckon it is the community spirit with Slimming World, it has been wonderful for me. I know I would not have lost nearly three stone without their help. I am healthier, happier and more confident and really enjoying my retirement. I am not a saint though, I still enjoy a nice piece of cake or a wicked pudding occasionally, just get back on the diet next day. Now I am going to spend rest of evening using Groovi plate. By the way you always look fab to me. xx

  12. Hi Barbara
    I love the pictures again today – I'm sure you didn't look like the little girl though! I don't do Facebook but do spend far too much time on my iPad! The last couple of years I have given up playing computer games for lent ( along with something sensible like chocolate!) and it's amazing how much time you gave to do other things like read a book or make something. I've promised to get myself some knitting – if my hands are occupied I won't nibble biscuits or chocolate! Healthy dinner tonight – hairy bikers chicken from their diet book followed by a carrot muffin – well we have to celebrate the bake off final! I'm with you though, I must improve my will power and restart the 5 and 2 diet, not good to be hungry in the winter but we must persevere. Enjoy your evening, chocolate and Facebook free, we are here to support you.
    Love Diane xxxxx

  13. Moderation is one of the words , acceptance that I am 68 and my body shape is changing .everything in moderation, and that include the things I could give up today and for a week ,or a month and loose a few pounds . BUT ( not Butt ) as soon as I would go back to foods I love , like chocolate and wine ( that not a food unless you consider it a fruit , and I do )! The weight comes back . Am I healthy do I exercise —– yes . .so I figure that life it too short to sacrifice , did plenty of that in my former catholic days , so a few glasses of wine and a healthy dark chocolate or two or three and enjoy and be happy .,a votre sante , prosit 🍷🎉😍. No guilt no never ,and that's my story and I'm sticking to it ! Love , joy and peace to all you dears in the UK and world .

  14. Well not sure if I am on the naughty step but I had a chocolate brownie before I read your blog Barbara. I was with you all the way with your views tonight ….. I too am that person.

    And as I was reading the blog I thought coo those mint balls look lovely…….

    But back to basics. ….. I know if I start I can't stop until the whole packet, box,packet, or container has gone. I eat in excess when stressed or worried or upset or cross and over these last few months I have had all 4. So my elasticated waistline trousers or skirt are at their limit.

    So JUST FOR TODAY no "peanut bar" evening treat or chocolate. Facebook ….. not sure if I can turn ft the notification but I will try not to look.


    Crafty hugs Pen x

  15. As you take one day at a time, try tackling one naughty habit at a time. Where I work the catering staff make wonderful puddings but it was seriously affecting my waistline so for the last 2 months I've only had one treat, I have yogurts instead but I can't quite give up the afternoon treat, yes we're very spoilt but I'm working on it. It's breaking a cycle and changing your way of thinking. I try not to give myself too much of a hard time because I'm only upsetting myself so I try to make little improvements bit by bit and yes I spend way too much time on FB and watching nonsense on the TV so now I'm going to walk my beloved pooches them give myself a break, have to watch GBBO then Dr Foster finale. Good night xx

  16. Chocolate!? I should be so lucky. For me it's not only chocolate, it's craft items – and yes, that includes all the beautiful things YOU tempt me with, Barbara! 🙂 Every day I say I'm not going back on the blog – I'll only see something else lovely and want the stamp/groovi plate/stencil… and what happens? Here I am, every day, reading and going Ooohhhh and Aaahhhh… and then I think Oh, what's another stamp/groovi plate/stencil, just buy it! And then the credit card statement comes in and my eyebrows jump into my hairline and I have to hide it from Himself… 😀 Yes, as someone else has said here, moderation is the key, in all things. But I think there should be an Exemption for Clarity products. Chocolate, I can resist. 🙂

  17. Oh Barbara. How I identify with this! AND of course I'm on my iPad !! You're right about the community though. It certainly helps. And the crafting community is brilliant. The positive thing about the iPad is it enables us to see your fabulous creations. Keep em coming. Hope Dave is improving. Love Diane. Xx

  18. Try to stay with you Barbara. I'm a Facebook fan too. What is it with this willpower? Got none either, can stay off the cakes and chocolate all day even when not crafting, but all goes to pot on an evening with my last cuppa. If I don't succomb and go to bed, my tummy is going over and making so much noise I end up coming down to get a biscuit of something. I have cut down on cake, only have a two finger kit Kat or a tiny chocolate roll, about 100 calories. Don't believe in paying for Weightwatchers or Slimming World and disgracng myself in front of anyone, I know that's how I would feel. I console myself that I have lost a little and not put on anymore pounds. Sorry but I'm addicted to Clarity like everyone here, that I will not give up.xx

  19. i can so relate to this. i used to be able to leave chocolate for weekend and that worked perfectly. but it's fallen by the wayside. i had more or less given up bread but somehow i have restarted. need to stop again. butter is not a problem as i have it very rarely. so i do get it big time, hugs xx

  20. Well, what timing. Yesterday someone I met for the first time thought I was pregnant…. err, no, that bump is just the legacy of being pregnant last year! Oh dear, not what I want to hear. So in the midst of trying to accept my changed body, but also be a bit good about food and a bit of exercise. Chocolate isn't my vice, it's crisps I can't go without! And Facebook – oh deary me. I have an app called Self control (it's a mac one) that allows you to block certain websites for a period of time – and Facebook is the only one I have in there. I used to use it when I was supposed to be working at home, and now I have to put it on in the evenings otherwise hours can disappear!

    PS There was an article doing the social media rounds a little while ago on the "real cause of addiction" – concluding quite convincingly that lack of social connection is the problem (rather than chemical processes in the brain), and therefore social connection the cure. Really interesting!

  21. Sorry no sympathy tonight from me! If I had your body and lovely face, then I would be pleased! I am not addicted to chocolate – just nicotine chewing gum – ugh you say. Well gave up smoking and now hooked on the gum. Not allowed to be on facebook because of the job and so miss out on all sorts of gossip. My husband says in his consultancy voice " Use the sudona method (some American very good psychology) Allow yourself. Not I should, or I must etc – just allow yourself to do or not do something. For me – well repeating myself – You are lovely in looks and in character and so creative. Yesterday's Geese were exceptional. I will allow myself to grow with your inspiration (not in height at my age – all of 4 something or other) but in creativity "Gray" style.
    Lots of love
    Anne (Reading)

  22. Oh dear. You will have to read thousands of replies tonight. Chocolate was an easy one to give up, I just told myself I was alergic to it – and am in a way – I put on weight if I just look at it. But wine … that's another story. It was just one glass with dinner, but now it's one glass making dinner, one with dinner and just a little sip after dinner. I guess that had better stop right now. Oh dear. xx Margaret Col.

  23. I think you're being awfully hard on yourself, Barbara. Do we need to test our willpower and use words like 'should' 'ought to' and 'must' unless it's really necessary? Not in your case, I would suggest; you always look great. Also you've had a lot to deal with recently and don't need extra self-imposed stress.
    I love chocolate ( and cake, and biscuits….) so I allow myself most evenings 1 small strip of a well known organic chocolate- with a lovely colour combination in the name. As I know I can have another the next day I don't feel too deprived by the limit. I watch what I eat and the weight stays more or less under control- sort of. And yes sometimes I go a bit mad and have to be extra hard on myself for a bit. But I don't feel too bad about it. Moderation and balance as a norm works for me. I really feel for those with restrictive conditions e.g. diabetes, and are forced to deprive themselves to remain healthy.
    Now crafting. That's a whole different issue where I have far less willpower!

  24. Get the chocolate thing, just had 3 pieces of dairy milk n half a box of maltesers and toast is my thing, can't live without it, as long as it's not affecting your health I say carry on, the more I tell myself no the more of the above I eat, psychological I know. Anyway off to bed with a good book xx

  25. Get the chocolate thing, just had 3 pieces of dairy milk n half a box of maltesers and toast is my thing, can't live without it, as long as it's not affecting your health I say carry on, the more I tell myself no the more of the above I eat, psychological I know. Anyway off to bed with a good book xx

  26. Sadly, I'm now allergic to chocolate 🙁
    But if you want to loose weight, see results, be healthier, no cost, no exercise…just cut out fat! Or at least never eat more than 4grams in any meal or snack. It's easy once you get going! Fx

  27. I wish I had read this earlier today before I ate two Magnums – because they were there. I have almost given up bread, really because I don't think it agrees with me and I do feel better without it. I have not had any butter today, but if I do have it, I mostly only have a scrape, except on toasted muffins or pikelets (otherwise known as crumpets in some parts of the country). I will start again tomorrow and choose not to have my addictions, and I will stay off Facebook etc until the end of the day to catch up with all my friends. I will also choose not to try putting Perga Glue in my eyes instead of eye drops – that was close, I am so glad it had blocked up. My Kindle tablet is flat so I will be reading in bed tonight instead of playing games. I have just started the first in a trilogy of fantasy novels, and am also half way through the Poldark novels as well. Enjoy your book, Barbara, and let us know what you are reading. xxxx Maggie

  28. It is a good idea to cut back on the bad things occasionally but I'm afraid I don't have much willpower. I do try at least to eat more good than bad and moderation in all things is what I try to follow, well most of the time. Good for you though Barbara. x

  29. Hi Barb, you are so slim, you don't need to give up anything! I was eating too much chocolate so stopped in July and haven't had any since, and I don't drink or do Facebook. BUT I smoke…. And H2B hates it, so maybe that should be my aim. Don't much fancy his chances if I stop, I'm sure I will not be nice to live with for a while!! Can always hide in my craft room and keep my bad mood to myself. Yep, think I will give it a try. Xx

    1. Hi Ruth
      Hubby was a 30+ a day smoker. He was very ill last year and had a major op on his lung. I did not think he would stop even then but he tried ecigarette and he has not smoked since. That was over a year ago.

  30. Hi Barbara
    I am a chocoholic!!! I have just realised that I am even more addicted to Candy Crush on IPad. I am going to try and see if I can do 24 hrs without playing. I will do Groovi instead but I may have to eat chocolate as well.
    X from Chris

  31. Morning Barbara I don't do facebook either but crisps and chocolate are my guilty pleasure. But my groovi system has been delivered so won't be eating any near that haven't had time to have a go yet but school holiday's coming up so even loose a couple of pounds while I'm grooving can't wait.
    take care….xx

    1. Morning girls I'm off to get some tumble dryer sheets anything else I need let me know appart from every groovi plate on the web site should have waited though have you checked out the xmas hamper deals groovi ones a bargain Dam gutted o well ….take care…xx

  32. I do try Barbara I love Facebook and this blog of course could I not look at my phone for a day ?the answer is no !!!!when my daughter comes to visit us in the morning she says the sight of two 80 year olds on the phone is hilarious love to Dave xxxxxxxx

  33. I've been exercising quite a bit of willpower lately, it IS difficult – but not impossible! Watching craft shows recently, I found myself reaching for the laptop to see if they were still in stock. That was the point I actually reminded myself the difference between needing and wanting. I really didn't NEED that gold and silver mirri-card – mind you I'm saving myself for the next Clarity word-chain, that I absolutely NEED!
    I can't see the point of Facebook as I am no longer in business and have no need of imaginary friends – I can get enough abuse at home!
    Magic Maggie

  34. Much as I love chocolate Barb, I would replace it with ANYTHING full of sugar, as it's that I am addicted too. Every day is a struggle for me, as I am semi disabled and can't really exercise (or at least not like running/walking) so if I want to lose weight, its (JUST, haha) a question of eating less. I don't do Facebook thank goodness, so at least I'm not addicted to that as well!

  35. Well Barbara – I missed your post as I was at Slimming World! I think my group really keep me going and it's so great to share ideas and have all the encouragement. There's a lady in my class who has lost 12 stone in a year and she's such an inspiration. I like that I can have what I choose, and mostly I choose not to eat something that will make me gain weight, as I choose to be slimmer!! Doesn't always work, but having the idea that you can start your day again at any point means that I can draw a line under the slip and get back on track – works for me! Susan x

  36. Because I was pregnant I stopped eating beef at the height of the 'mad cow' disease saga and have never returned to eating it. I could eat it, I used to like it but I choose not to eat it. I have no desire whatsoever to eat beef. IF only I could have the same resolve over chocolate/snacks/sugar my weight problem would be resolved.

    I spend about an hour in an evening on facebook, it's not linked to my phone so it's only at home when I am half on the laptop and half watching the tv

    My biggest weakness is buying craft stash, including lots of clarity, that just sits in boxes/drawers often unopened. I have lots of intentions, a bit of talent but……… just can't find the energy, enthusiasm and desire to make anything because the negative chants in my head will remind me that in reality I have no talent and what I make will be rubbish. I really ought to stop buying more stash but…………

  37. Hi Barb, well we all have addictions and lapses in willpower it seems. I try limit my FB to the morning before work, don't get much time during the day with work, and then in the evening it is dinner, dishes, tele and bed. I wish you strength in avoiding those things, but as they say if at first you don't succeed, just try and try again. Take care. Bx

  38. sorry I am no help. I need to put on weight! I have eaten all the naughty things today and currently sitting here munching a Twirl. and do you know what – I don't care – life is too short!

    M x

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