Sitting at the back.

Sitting at the back.

Hi there

Thanks for popping in. What a strange world we live in. I just attended a funeral online. Sat at the back, here alone in front of my computer, with a bunch of friends who were also sat at the back in their respective homes, in front of their computers.

We were all there to support a dear friend who recently lost her husband. It’s uncanny actually. That you can be hundreds of miles away, and yet be there, in the chapel. The pain and sorrow, the sadness and loss were palpable. It was just like sitting at the back. You may think this was bizzare, but actually, I was very glad to be allowed to participate in his farewell and be there for my friend, albeit virtually.

There’s only one thing for it. I have to make a little piece of art, and to spend a little time with her in my head. To send her healing energy, to tell her she will be okay. I’ll write her a letter, and pretend we’re having a cuppa together.

Life is hard sometimes, isn’t it.

Stay safe.

Love always

Barb xxx

33 thoughts on “Sitting at the back.

  1. Very poignant and what a lovely thing to do for your friend. I am sure that she felt all the support, even though you couldn’t be there in person. Hugs. Annette X

  2. Hugs, Barb. I did the same recently after losing a very dear friend. It was such an honor to be invited by, and grieve with her loved ones xoxo

  3. This brought tears to my eyes, you are so kind. At a time like this we all need our friends. I am sure she appreciated the support albeit virtual.

  4. I was at a virtual funeral this week for my friend’s mum (managed to “go” while at still at work). Although it felt very strange watching on my phone, I did feel that I was there supporting her and her family. Will really miss her mum, who used to mix up my son Fraser with her grandson Fraser, both tall, dark haired and gangly! She always had a smile and even though her sigh failed over the last few years always loved a ‘Fiona card’ that was hand made and with embellishments she could feel.
    It’s good to treasure the joy that she brought to so many.

  5. How sad life is sometimes, I am sure your friend appreciated you being there even from afar. Very kind thoughts Barbara x

  6. What a beautiful card which I’m sure will be appreciated. We travelled to Oxford recently for my BIL’s funeral. It was a very strange event with no music being accompanied by human voices and all the social distancing measures. Not being able to physically comfort our nephew was heartbreaking.

  7. Sending you lots of love, Barbara. I have done several for which there has been a link and always acknowledge that the other people are there and as much part of the service as those of us in the service room. Your card is lovely and I really like the sentiment.
    Be gentle with yourself tonight. Hxx

  8. Lovely words and card Barbara. I’ve done a couple of these, sitting at the back, and found them very poignant. Both of mine were people I used to work with who had retired way before. Travel gently xx

  9. I’m sure your friend will cherish the artwork and appreciate you being with her to say goodbye. Grief is the price of love and where would we be without that?

  10. Sending you hugs. It is a strange world at the moment. Fred and I attended a friend’s funeral a couple of weeks ago. It seemed very strange with no singing and social distancing. I felt so emotional all the way through but was grateful that we were able to say our goodbyes. X X

  11. How sad Barb but it was so good that you were virtually there to support your friend…… on Monday when you told us about someone who had passed away, I was grieving too for a very dear friend who had not survived some serious cancer surgery and passed away on Sunday evening. I had the call just before we started our session and you helped me enormously to come to terms with my unhappiness so thankyou. Our crafting is such a blessing isn’t it…. Love Beryl x

  12. So sorry for you but I’m sure your friend is grateful that you attended virtually. I know I found it comforting when my Mum died a couple of months ago to know that although not physically present people were still there ‘at the back’ supporting us through a very difficult time. My thoughts are with you and your friend. Xxx

  13. Hi Barbara the card you have made for your friend is gorgeous. I am sure your friend will love it. Making a card like this is a really special gesture at a difficult time. We have been to a virtual funeral. Technology is amazing. Take care. Hugs xxx

  14. A beautiful card, so sad particularly in these difficult times, thank goodness for technology, it certainly brings us all “together” .

  15. Oh Barbara, I know exactly how you feel. Although it’s hard I appreciated recently being able to attend my Aunties funeral virtually, and I’m sure sitting at the back on my own was better for me than not being able to pay my respects and say my goodbyes. It wasn’t possible to travel from Edinburgh to Doncaster after only just returning to work after spending 3 weeks with Mum in Kent who’s fighting Ovarian cancer. First time I’d been able to safely travel to visit her since her diagnosis in December. My Aunty passed due to lung cancer diagnosed just a week before Mums diagnosis. It really hits hard, but I’m sure your thoughts and virtual present was appreciated. Travel gently and take time to greive. Sending hugs.xx

  16. So sorry to hear of your sad loss not an easy time for your friend and family .Being present in the moment even though separated by distance is indeed very meaningful and creates healing energy .
    I too have attended virtual funerals and am struck by how dignified they can be .Take care of yourself xxx

  17. I have experienced the same thing. My best girlfriend passed away and I watched the funeral virtually as well. Very different for sure but I was thankful that I was able to feel apart of it to say my goodbyes. So sorry for your loss. It is never easy to say goodbye to a loved one. Hugs from Canada 🇨🇦

  18. Thank you for sharing a lovely piece of art with beautiful words which will mean a lot to your friend knowing that you made it especially for her. Being able to take part in the service although remotely will also mean a lot to her, knowing that you were there. These occasions are not easy & in these uncertain times the fact that we can’t give real hugs when they are so needed is hard. Take care x

  19. Being there is the most you can do for someone. Virtual presence shows thought as does you supportive crafting.

  20. Hi Barbara
    Sorry to read your blog today Sorry for your friends loss and sorry you all had to be there virtually
    Hopefully this COVID fiasco will be under control soon and we will all be able to hug friends when they need it most Hugs to you. Txx

  21. Hi Barbara
    At my brothers funeral in April it was limited numbers and my niece and nephew wanted to attend but we have a large family and he had 6 children so it wasn’t possible. So they sat in the car park watching it online they both said it was very emotional but felt better for being there.
    Lovely card whilst you were making that your friend was definitely in your thoughts and I am sure she will be thankful for that.
    Love Ruth & Jackie xx

  22. How times are changing. Who’d have thought technology could bring you so close yet be so far from the actual service. Still it means alot to be part of the farewells. I’ve been asked by hubby’s nursing home which funeral directors we will be using. Bit of a bolt but understandable. Hell not even thought about it. Spent all evening researching them all in the area. They all provide videoing though. Heads swimming. Now to consult rest of family. Would love to get a motorbike hearse. Silly money. Perhaps I should don my leathers, jump on the wing and tow him along on the trailer. What a sight. My feet can’t even reach the ground being a shortie. Got to laugh at the thought though. Seriously its so lovely to be part of such an emotional goodbye. Sorry I hope I’ve lightened your sadness. Xxx

  23. Hello Barb, sending you hugs for you and your friend. I will be attending a virtual funeral this week too, for a very dear friend who passed away quite suddenly, not from Covid though. It will be the 2nd one I join in whilst this pandemic has been around and we have been in lockdown or restricted from attending in person. At least we can be with them in spirit. Your card is certainly going to lift your friends spirits, lovely words. Bx

  24. I so feel for those who at the beginning of Covid couldn’t have any type of service for their loved one. At least now there are virtual funerals and they can be quite creative. I attended one for a close friend and it was beautiful. You made a beautiful card.

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