My Mum, Dad and brother are right-handed,
although my Mum was certainly born left-handed,
but they forced her to use her right hand at school.
This was not uncommon back in the day.
In fact, they tied her left hand behind her back,
which is rather extreme, don’t you agree?
Try that in the local secondary modern!!
Interestingly though, she has beautiful handwriting nonetheless,
and does everything else with her left hand!
Must tell you a story about my Mum when she was younger…
Dad had taken her to a posh dinner and dance in London.
Partway through dinner, the chap sitting next to her whispered in her ear, “keep to your left, Madame”.
Mum was rather perplexed, smiled and carried on eating.
“Keep to your left, Madame,” he repeated.
Three times he made the same request,
and finally Mum turned to him.
(You have to say this out loud in a strong German accent)
“How do you know I am learning to drive?” she asked.
“You are eating my bread roll, Madame” he responded.
For about 15 years I used to cut all the stamps out by hand.
That was what I did every single evening.
I would sit in fron of the TV with a tray on my lap
and cut out stamps.
Boy was I fast! My hands were pretty deformed because I was using right hand scissors, and the moulded handles were digging into me. Somebody kindly bought me a left-handed pair of scissors thinking it would help me.
But my oh my!! All you lefties out there! It was hopeless!
Same with a potato peeler.
Same with golf clubs.
Same with a guitar.
Even though I am a seriously left-handed person,
I use right-handed tools and equipment.
Anyway, it’s not Left Handers Day,
(That’s in August. Wonder why….)
but here’s a neat little You Tube with some gems.
“After a considerable period of grieving, I guess I would. We all need companionship.”
“If I died and you remarried,” the husband asks, “would he live in this house?”
“We’ve spent a lot of money getting this house just the way we want it. I’m not going to get rid of my house. I guess he would.”
“If I died and you remarried, and he lived in this house,” the husband asks, “would he sleep in our bed?”
“Well, the bed is brand new, and it cost us $2000. It’s going to last a long time, so I guess he would.”
“If I died and you remarried, and he lived in this house and slept in our bed, would he use my golf clubs?”
“Oh, no!” the wife replies. “He’s left-handed!”