I even went and bought a bathing suit, so that I could take advantage of what was on offer at the hotel this evening. Mum declined, so I went off alone in my brand new Speedo cozzy….

Super pool. You know the ones that go outside too, so you are under the stars in the water.

So I was in a world of my own; inside, outside, lengths, back outside, hottub, the lot. Decided to find the sauna. Lovely. Nobody but me. Hot, very hot, but good for the mind apparently, so I stare at the timer on the wall and wait for the sand to fall through. Then the door opens and in comes a man. He obviously decided to bypass the Speedo shop. Then I remember! Germans often like to get their kit off in the sauna! Now don’t get me wrong. Live and let live and all that. But not when he almost slapped me on the shoulder with it!! I was out of that cubicle before he’d even singed his nuts on the bench!

Remind me to tell you what happened once in Aachen in a spa. That was on a trip with Mum too! I got slung out for being the only one dressed!!

Anyway, back to Baden Baden..ironically, baden in German means bathing…..

So I fled to the outdoor pool, and was just minding my own business out there, when this other bloke starts bobbing around me, chatting to me. Here we go again, I think….yep, he’s a businessman from Iran, and do I like Persian carpets, because he has an international carpet business. So I have a question: How do you say sod off in Persian? All I wanted to do was chillax! And no, I don’t like Persian carpets!

I gave up in the end and fled back to Mum! 

She did laugh when I told her about my relaxing spa session. And Dave, if you’re reading this, the Persian looked just like Toad of Toad Hall, and the one in the sauna? I have no idea – I didn’t look!!!

Lots of love from Baden Baden,

Barb xxxx