Never tire of doing the next right thing.

Never tire of doing the next right thing.

Hi there

Thanks for popping in. Woke up this morning, and actually had nothing specific to do – apart from this ’ere blog, of course! Dave had to work, so the day was mine to use as I pleased. Of course I have always got enough work to more than fill all my days forever and ever! Clarity Towers is always there, looming in the background! But I am trying to avoid work at the weekends unless absolutely necessary. I did way too many years of mostly 7 days a week, and now I realise that the weekends are there for a reason. We all need to switch off, pump the brakes, do something different. Even doing nothing is doing something!

But back to today…I could do some pottery, I could potter in the house, I could go to the Farmer’s market in the Pantiles/Tunbridge Wells. MMM…choices choices…. Then Mum came into my head. Sorted. Instantly, I had a very specific plan, and a pleasant one too.

So I packed the car with all sorts of provisions that Mum always needs, and trundled off to Gillingham. I knew she’d be at home alone, and I also knew she’d enjoy some company. I couldn’t think of anybody I’d rather spend my day with either.

She was indeed delighted to see me. We sat and chatted for hours, drank tea and coffee, tried the lovely German sourdough loaf I brought to the party, and the German smoked ham – it was like being transported back to North Germany, where I was born. Tastes and smells can do that, can’t they? So we took a little trip down Memory Lane, which was also very cathartic. Talked fondly about Dad, went back in time, to when he was happy and healthy, and all was well. We were so lucky to have a dad like Dad.

The sun even came out for us – albeit briefly !

But this was not a Daughter-Duty Day today. No, no! This was genuinely a desire to spend quality time with Mum.

I know that many of you will be reading this, and will be wishing your Mum were still around, and that you could hang out with her, and drink tea, and have a good old chinwag. I get it. I really do. And I wish it were so for you. I have a future memory of that time, and have had for years. What I wouldn’t give for a chat with Dad now.

Also, I hate to think of Mum sitting alone, day in day out. She is a loner, and certainly copes very well with her own company. But I do know she enjoys having her kids around. Brother Steve visits her often too, and phones her every day, which she loves. They are very close.

Quote of the day today?

Never tire of doing the next right thing.

Time to chill. What are your plans for this weekend?

See you on Monday at 10am in the SHAC. That’s when the old SHAC bus is leaving the Depot again!

Love always

Barb x x x

28 thoughts on “Never tire of doing the next right thing.

  1. We try to adopt the attitude that weekends are just for us but, unfortunately, this weekend so far has been busy with chores . The photograph of your parents in ‘happier times’ is lovely and thank you for sharing. I’ll do my best to be on time on Monday but I will have a doctors note if not – that’s is my telephone appointment is late 😂

  2. Pleased you had a great day with your mum.
    You seem to have got your head in the right place taking time to just BE and do those thing that give you pleasure. Enjoy the rest of this lovely sunshiny day
    Hugs 🍒

  3. So glad you have spent time with Mum, today. Its so nice just to spend quality time with the ones you love. That’s what weekends are for. Yes food and smells also music can transport you. I’m so happy you’ve are taking time to enjoy weekends.xx

  4. So pleased you had time to spend with your Mum. I was in Sissinghurst on a National Trust trip. I walked around the gardens remembering the time I took my Mum at least 15 years ago. It was a boiling hot day then and she had to keep taking rests. After torrential rain all last night (we’re staying in Maidstone) we were thankful this afternoon was so much brighter. So, in my memories I spent time with my Mum too

  5. also had a lovely day spending time with brother and sister both of who have been recently bereaved.

  6. Lovely photo of your dear Mum and Dad. Good way to spend your day. Looking forward to joining the bus on Monday.

  7. Our Mum is still with us at 93 and she lives alone but my sis is a few mins walk in the next road and gets her lunch every day, makes sure she has her tablets and eye drops and my brother-in-law does her garden, well it’s his now! Vegetables and flowers and big lawns to mow. Mum can’t see great and has the tv turned up loud but not so to bother the neighbours ! She has her budgie and is always talking to him. In fact she has more to say to him than to us ! She’s goes to a lunch club and an afternoon chat club. I often think she might be better in a home with company but she’d probably have something to say about that ! I do wonder sometimes how my sister does it but she does – it’s when she’s away that makes me think as I take over. We can never go away at the same time. She has her marbles but sometimes pretends not to ! I miss my Dad, thought of him a lot this afternoon as it’s Grand National day and he loved the horses. Anyway, I’ve rambled …. I’m glad you had a good day with your Mum and enjoy them. X

  8. Such a special photo and sounds like you spent a very special day with mum. I’ve had my cousin stay with me since Tuesday. She bought some Ostern Schinken with her from Austria – so I also have a treat of sour dough bread and ham tomorrow when I visit my lovely mum. She celebrated her 95th recently – so proud of her living alone. My cousin is the last Austrian relative so mum was so overjoyed to see her and so was I. I lost dad in 2013 and still miss him terribly so I make the most of chatting to mum – love her wisdom and there’s been a lot of chat about the old days with my cousin asking lots of questions.

    I took my cousin to Hever Castle Thursday- drove through Edenbridge and pointed out Clarity Towers. We stopped in Limpsfield at a lovely pub for lunch. I’m exhausted and can’t even sit to craft right now so I’m in bed resting today after a trip to Luton Airport.

    Lots of 💕

  9. Oh Barbara, this must be the most truthful blog you have ever done. We all consider our own mum and dad, the best. I would give anything to see them again, even for a second. But memories are there and so very precious.

  10. Enjoy every single minute you can spend with your Mum Barbara. My Mum died suddenly 11 years ago on 11th March, a week before Mother’s Day – she was my best friend and I miss her so very much…….
    She did traditional parchment and I like to imagine that she is pleased with the projects that I create……

  11. So glad you’ve had a good and happy day with your Mum and you’ve been able to reminisce together about your Dad. Seems like its done you both a power of good and what better way is there to spend a Saturday together?

  12. What a lovely day for you and your Mum. Weekends and downtime are so important to rejuvenate for the work weeks.
    My Mom is 95, lives on her own and is independent with a walker, but is amazing. I know I won’t have her forever and it is important to spend time together and share experiences. My Dad has been gone for 22 years this July and I know my Mom would never have believed that she would be a widow for that long after a marriage of 48 years.

  13. Lovely photo of your Mum and Dad. What a lovely day your Mum and you had! Oh, and the good old trip down Memory Lane, too. I had a bit of that today when I had a video chat with my Mum in Germany especially as today 4 years ago my Dad passed away. Quality time with Mum is very important – even if you can’t be there in person! Please do give my love to your Mum.
    Have a good rest of the weekend. Alles Liebe ❤

  14. I’m across the Medway from Gillingham in Hoo and I’d give anything for Mum to be here. Unfortunately she was only 67, she never knew her great grandchildren. Treasure every moment. I’m glad you still have her to treasure x

  15. Hi Barbara
    Jackie managed to break her little toe during the night cat’s fault. We were booked in to spend the day having a tour around a commune called Tinkers Bubble. Unfortunately Jackie had to cry off but I went along and enjoyed it apart from the mud and the hills but was very interesting. Glad you spent time with your mum, I’m one of those who can no longer do this as mum passed last June. I do still talk to her every day which helps and time does ease the pain but I’m not going to lie it’s still tough. Your dad’s passing is still very raw and will take time, but it’s still lovely to reminisce with your mum.
    Love Ruth and Jackie xx

  16. Sounds like you have had a lovely day with your mom & having more non work time. I am lucky to still have my mom & at nearly 95 I know she won’t be here forever. At the moment she is well & loving life in her flat that she moved to last year which is closer to us. I can pop round more often & can keep a check on tablets, food & housework etc. She joins in with the events in the complex so now has more of a social life than she did before although she may be banned from the bingo as she keeps winning !!
    Just caught up with last nights FB live as we have been away for a few days on a canal boat with family. Now I need to find the ingredients from my stash & give it a go as the effect of the new techniques look great. Thanks for sharing them with us.

  17. Can,t watch Craftalong life, too early in Australia 4am. Watched on YouTube last night australian time. Love stamping on parchment. Demonstrated this a few years ago at a craft show and tried out different stampads to see what worked. Indeed Archival permanent quick drying works the best. I have a lot of pergamano stamps, and now clarity as well. Black stamping and embossing has always a stunning end result.
    Glad you caught up with your mum on the “spur of the moment”. These are the best visits. Enjoy.

  18. Hello Barb, thank you for sharing this lovely photo of your Mum and Dad with us. Glad you got to spend some quality time with her. I still talk to my Mom and Mum-in-law in my head, especially when I need to sort something out. Another brilliant quote, it really makes my day to read them. Take care everyone. Bx

  19. What a lovely blog Barb – your Mum is lucky to have a daughter like you. I wish you were my daughter!!!! My girls don’t visit very often (one is in a bad place right now blaming me for all her troubles I think and the other lives 5 hours away but phones every day). However, mustn’t grumble – I have my little dog for company and I just keep crafting! Looking forward to Mondays SHAC session – Thankyou Barb for all you do for us lonely people……

  20. What a super picture of your Mum and Dad Barbara. So glad you had a lovely day with your Mum and pleased to hear that she is coping so well on her own. My Dad is 90 and Mum is 86 . I try to see them as often as I can as I know they won’t be here forever. They love to talk about their time in Southern Rhodesia in the late 50’s. They married in November 1956 and sailed off to Africa in January 1957. My Mum was just 21 at the time and I’m so proud of them, as it must have been a huge step to take at that time. They spent a three and a bit very happy years in Karoi only coming home 2 years after having me as they wanted to be closer to family. I know a lot of people would give anything to have some more time with their parents, my husband included as he lost his Dad when he was 6.and his Mum 16 years ago, so I know that I am very lucky.


  21. Ah they look such a happy devoted couple. I can see some of both of them in you. I was closest to my Dad and miss him although he died in 2015. We shared a sense of humour and the ridiculous. He loved bowling, cycling, camping and made lots of glass engraved beer mugs for family, friends and members of the bowling club. Such happy memories never dim. Hugs to your mum xx

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