Thanks for popping in. How are you? How are you coping? Good days and growing days.
The daily Doodle sessions are creating a shift in me, if I may say so. Never having been a confident person, I usually tend to morph into various personalities, depending on who I am with. Even my dialect and choice of words will change if you’re posh and don’t swear. But now I am alone in the room above the garage, day after day after day. And there is nobody to bounce off, to reflect myself off there – except 500 people!
I am discovering who I am. I’m spending so much time in my own company and in my own head, that I am also getting quite used to me.
At 61, I think it’s time to be myself. As Oscar Wilde said:
Be Yourself. Everyone else is already taken.
There are so many of us, but we’re all different. There are millions – nay billions – of us, but no two people are identical. Not even identical twins.
And I guess, in the light of this global pandemic, I am feeling a sense of importance around becoming who I really am. Or should I say, about becoming comfortable with who I am?
My job as I see it, but it always has been, is to stay upbeat and keep smiling, not to inflict my stuff on you. That rule mostly stops me from going to the back of the cave, and it certainly mostly stops me from taking anybody back there with me! You fake it to make it, you keep your filter in, and you smile.
But now there is a need rising up in me to be true to myself. I have a beautiful picture of Grace somewhere, with words by Dr Seuss. Let me find it….
Mmm. So on that note, I shall admit that I am worn out and fit to drop today. Ready to stop.
Signing off for the day.
Stay safe. Love and Hugs,
- PS. Don’t forget! CLARITY is on hochanda.com at
- 5pm this afternoon,
- 3pm Friday.
- 11am and 1pm Saturday.
30 thoughts on “Be yourself.”
We love you just as you are. Everyone fakes it at work – and close people see straight through it. Do you think air crew smile for 12 hours at home? Or really feel calm if the alarms are going off? Of course you are fit to drop with the amount you have been doing. Part of being comfortable being you is knowing when you need to rest. Get yourself out in the garden, topping up that Vitamin D. Stay safe, happy and well. You couldn’t stop being creative if you tried!
PS I won’t be on Hochanda – but I will be at the till Saturday with the wonderful doodling things. So, so wonderful.
Exactly the same comment as Ali has posted. Time to be you by looking after you, big hugs cos we all love you xx
Hi Barb, glad to hear you are learning to like, love, who you are. And so you should, there is an awful inside there for you to love, and to let shine out for the world to see and love too. We’re all human, none of us are robots, we all have feelings, good and bad. Letting out the bad and negative feelings needs to happen too, especially during this living nightmare. We all need to, every single one of us, for our mental health at the very least. Bottling it all up is no good for you. It’ll just make you feel so miserable, make you ill, and it will all just explode out in an uncontrollable huge way at some point anyway. Better to let things out calmly as you feel them to whomever you feel you can trust and safe to open up to. It’s not a failure to need people, and to need to let stuff out and ask for help/support/a listening ear. Far from it, it’s a strong and brave person who does that. Just talking stuff out before it boils up has hugely therapeutic.
No wonder you are worn out! Glad you have admitted that to yourself and have decided to stop for today. Good decision mrs!!!
Us who are autistic have the opposite problem, we find it pretty much impossible to NOT show what is in our heads and hearts… Gets us in a lot of trouble in the normal world…
I hope you have found something nice to do for the rest of your day. Take it easy. Love you xxx
Get that pan and spoon out this evening and bang away at 8pm, get some of your feelings out while making noise for our essential workers. That’s what I’ll be doing…
We all love you Barbara and so enjoy the daily doodle but you must take some time out if you feel overwhelmed by all that is happening, we will all still be here when you come back…..take care, stay safe xxxx
Totally agree with Ali and Karen. Take care and be kind to yourself you are doing an awesome job and we all appreciate and love you.xx
Love you, Barbara.xxx
Hochanda reception on my telly is poor, but I have been a-spending on the Clarity website (in fact I think I may not have paid enough, I never understand how the prices are worked out – no doubt someone will let me know if you need more)!
I’m glad you are happy in your skin a bit.
Maggie (Bendy Yorkite) – Bendy just brought me a baby bird, which survived. I popped the bird back outside in the big tree – hope it is recovering (sadly, they rarely do)
I am glad you are taking time out, just for you. You have been so busy recently. I think it is good to spend time on your own. I enjoy spending time on my own as it allows me to process what is happening around me. I also really love spending time with people, so it’s challenging just now, but love that you come into my living room every day and teach me to draw, then come along later with your blog which I have a cup of tea with to listen to what you are saying.
I have spent today cleaning and clearing out drawers which has been very cathartic. Probably need to do things like clearing stuff out more often, but it is a bit more difficult with the dumps being closed. Need to pace myself to not overfill the bins! Thankful that I have this time to stay home to do these things I keep putting off. Now for some more crafting.
We have just finished dinner and I was telling my family how much I enjoy the doodle hour and how interesting you make it. My 13 year old granddaughter has also been watching and is loving the way you show us what to do. You are making such a difference to our lives and we thank you. Enjoy a relaxing evening and feel better tomorrow. Hugs. Annette X
Hi Barbara, you do a great job, Find it hard to find time to do as much crafting as I would like. Am a front line worker picking shopping for people how can not get out.Start work at 2am, 5 days a week . and then come home to take care of my wonderful elderly mum. Sunday is time to loose myself in groovie and pergamno. Keep smiling and take care xxxxx.
Two or three things to ponder:
Who would I be without my story? I am not my story.
I read a book years ago called: Will the real me please stand up!
Someone once said to me: Sit quietly with yourself and do nothing. I prefer to do something! I was told, so you won’t spend time with yourself but you’re happy to inflict that person on everyone else! It wasn’t said cheekily, more tongue in cheek! Lol. Interesting!
I don’t think I need to comment further. Take care of yourself, Barb. Lots of love. Hxx
You need to be yourself and also take time for yourself. You must have so much to contend with at the moment. Thanks for that doodle hour and take care xx
Love you, Barb! xoxo
Glad you are learning to love the being who is you. Do remember to take the time to smell the roses.
I spent so much of my early life being ridiculed and put down, ignored or shut out of things, that I decided to just be me. If people didn’t like it so be it, you cannot please everyone and so long as you do no harm to anyone that’s OK. My attitude now is “this is me, take me or leave me, love me or hate me, but don’t try to make me what I am not” and it has stood me in good stead. The crafters I taught in in my workshops would say they liked me because what you see is what you get. No fudging, no side. Now I have a lovely husband who is intelligent and funny, who appreciates who I am and is very supportive. Things all turned out right in the end.
Had a fantastic day colouring all the toppers I made yesterday and am just now watching the recorded 5pm show. More ideas to try – great.
Incidentally, I have put the Groovi grip on both sides of my ruler so it doesn’t slip when cutting or when it is turned over to draw ink lines.
Currently making a list of purchases I want to make after the Saturday show.
Keep well, keep positive and know you are loved by many.
Haven’t done me arrow still been doing me dream catcher try to get it better realised I had been dividing my dream catcher int two four sections instead of 3 what am I like anyway happier with it know and redoing my feathers got it happier with them used the pen so know watching again the arrow ready to have a go. You relax have some you time sending love and hugs I had a day yesterday it all got on top of me Joy xxx
Take time for yourself Barbara. You are helping all of us cope at this difficult time but you need time out too. It has surprised me how much I have enjoyed being furloughed. I have worked all my life, no time off for babies or anything else. This is the first time in my 60 years I can just sit in the garden listen to the birds & smell the roses or bake a cake when I want to & I am loving it! I have even been trusted to handfeed a very hungry blackbird who appears every time I open the back door. Sadly Covid has taken my crafty mojo but I know it will return. Enjoy some you time, try & relax & smell those roses. We all care deeply for you special lady. Take care xxx
Sorry to hear you are feeling a bit down. As you know me and my other half you appreciate how people can be mean.
I have a large family and during a particular difficult time 2 things happened my brother brought me a record ( remember them) by Jimmy Sommerville called there’s more to love than boy meets girl and my sister brought me a sign
for my Craft space which reads “ I am who I am your approval is not necessary “. You are one of the most genuine inspirational women I have had the pleasure to meet. Be kind to yourself there is a song called the woman in your life by Alex Dobkin when you have the time have a listen it always makes me think.
Love you lots keep doing what you do best👍
Hi all. Brenda you talk about the “normal world” – but there is no particular “normal”; each world is the normal for someone. We cannot know if there is another world, because we each live in our own normal world! And Barb – your doodles have been such a bonus for me, but please don’t overdo yourself to please me – be who you are and take time for yourself, because you are greatly appreciated.
I’m not surprised that you are so tired, you really must give time for just you – forget us , we can practice everything that you’ve taught us. I know that I certainly need plenty of that!!! I’m really sorry that you are feeling down too and hope that things improve for you. Beautiful picture of Grace. Take care, sending lots of love,Alison xx
I love that Dr Zeus saying, busy crafting today after the weekly stress about going to the supermarket! No que outside today so at least that bit was better than it has been. Xx
I am new to this site and have recently begun watching your you tube videos and I so enjoy them, but I especially enjoy you! You’ve made me laugh out loud at times and have also given me courage to try new things, craftwise. I had no real idea of how to even begin and, though they’re far from perfect, it allowed me peace of mind in our current situation! Be yourself, enjoy yourself, be kind to yourself…I am sure I’m not the only one for whom you’ve made the days better!
Hi Barbara! Your blog today hit a note with me…. In fact it was more like an overture!
I spent all my teaching career being a person others expected me to be! Yes part of the person that faced those children day after day was me but not the complete me.
It’s amazing how we conform to what is expected of you dependent on your job or the people you associate with. And how your personality changes to suit the occasion.
I think now I am retired from my teaching role I am more me than I’ve ever been. And I’m not talking about being able to have my pink hair and wear colourful leggings and tops. I mean that I can do and say whatever I like in my own space and I’m not being judged on how many As I’ve got or how many of my students met their targets.
I’m not being held accountable for my actions as the only people they affect is me and hubby.
Being comfortable in your own skin comes with age and experience and having an acceptance of what you’ve been dealt. Once that happens then and only then can you really be you!
Sleep soundly and I’ll see you tomorrow.
Love and hugs xx
Hi Barbara Just to say thank you very much for all you teach us but please look after yourself first and rest more. We have been in lockdown for 10 weeks now due to age and ill health and also I have Agoraphobia so staying in not so much of a problem but having no choice about it is and I miss my freedom such as is was how daft is that !!!
I, like hundreds of others ,have gained so much from you
as you have kept us engaged in ”Doodle School”
You are a very hardworking teacher and as such you probably need a break. Please make room to’ take a half-term’ for yourself to recoup your energy. We have been given plenty of lovely things to play with to keep us going.
Thank you Barbara.X
Go and have a slow walk around your garden and do what you tell us in the SHAC SHACK – really look at what you’re looking at. I’m sure you’ll find something interesting, calming, beautiful. Take Dave with you and just enjoy being with each other for a little while.
Thanks for sharing your stuff and honesty with your Clarity family who love you to bits…
My “Go to” book at the moment is “The Boy, The Mole, The Fox and The Horse” by Charlie Mackesy, along with an evening with “Grayson’s Art Club” on channel 4. Both uplifting and honest in these days of roller coaster emotions.
Stay close to the things you love. 💕
First of all, Grace looks beautiful in that photo.
Does Grace have the same lack of confidence? because she doesn’t look like she does, just like you.
I always seem to have only one true friend at a time, the rest are more people I know, and every time we move, out of an area, I lose that closeness, it is not the same keeping long distance contact. In this new area I only know 5 people, from a group I joined. I do not make friends easily. I am not an open person, but I do have my late Nan’s and Dad’s loose tongue, and find it hard to pretend. The opposite to you.
You, on the other hand seem to have a lot of real friends. You are either not open with those friends, or you do not realise you have shown your true self already, and do not need to be afraid of it any more.
There is a difference between pretending to have a confident manner in a working, business way. If it is this which is bothering you, you have done alright from it and have more friends in working life than most people, so don’t stress about it. It’s okay.
It’s my 69th birthday next week, can’t believe it, I still feel in my head like I am around 50. If I can’t do what I like, within reason, now, when can I? We aren’t here on earth long enough, are we?
Love the quotes Barb, be yourself, sign off, feet up, and a lovely cup of tea.
Take care of yourself Barbara and love yourself as the person who you really are.
I made the same mistake-always trying to please other people even my kids and husband.
After many troubles and a very difficult time after my husband passed away, I did choose to be myself-doing things I like to do, buying things I like, wearing things I like even when it makes me looking thick or the color doesn’t makes me more beautiful….I don’t care what other people are saying.
This made me a lot happyer even it’s only me now I live on my own.
Please Barbara if it is too much to do every weekday a doodle with us,you can do it on Monday, Wendnesday and Friday Android wewill still busy the other day with our doodling.
Take care and stay healthy!!! A big hug and lots of prayers and love to you. 💖👼🕯🙏⚘
Hello Barb, just sending big hugs and thanks, for being you and being there for us. At least we can be there for you too. Take care lovely lady. Bx