Thanks for popping in on this rather wet Wednesday.
Wednesday’s blog, although called ‘Mindful Wednesday’, is the blog where we look at life and its rich tapestry.
Don’t you sometimes just shake your head in dismay, disappointment or disbelief?
I can only speak for myself, but there are times in life where no amount of trying to work out the why’s and wherefore’s
is either productive or useful.
Can’t control it. Can’t help. Can’t change it.
When I was younger I wanted to save the world.
I remember as a student, getting on coaches in Manchester
and coming down to Anti-Nazi rallies in London.
Getting abuse hurled at us by yobs and skinheads.
Wouldn’t cross my mind now to get involved!
I remember taking a family of East Germans home for a few days,
when I lived in Germany, because they had nowhere to go.
That was just before the Iron Curtain was done away with.
I was pregnant with Grace at the time.
Helmut Kohl, the Federal Chancellor offered to give every
East German who visited the West 100DM.
And so they came.
Oh! I must tell you this!
My husband at the time, Grace’s and Mark’s Dad,
was a black dude. He was also a lawyer in the US Army.
So this little East German lad came in the house,
having just arrived from the Eastern Block for the first time in his little life, and having spent an hour in the city of Nürnberg.
He saw Rob, 6ft 4″, in his BDUs
(the battle dress uniform fatigues that all soldiers wear, regardless of rank)
He gazed up at him, then turned to me and the look on his face
I shall never forget.
“Das gibt’s nicht!! Den habe ich doch gerade in der Stadt gesehen!”
(Translated: No way!! I just saw him in town!)
He had never seen an American soldier, or a black person.
What he didn’t realise was that Bavaria was of course occupied by the Americans and there were thousands of tall black dudes there!
I probably learned more about Communism Vs Capitalism
in that one weekend than I will ever learn in my lifetime.
All the children wanted was bananas.
They had never eaten bananas before.
And the price of bananas sky rocketed in Nürnberg that weekend.
Do you know what I remember too?
That same family came back all the way from Dresden in their old Trabant, to meet Grace in the hospital when she was born some months later.
Not to stay, no. Just to bring flowers and say hello.
Good people abound.
Good people abound.
But so do bad people.
At the ripe old age of 56, I am still baffled by people and their behaviour.
I watch the news in horror, often confused and bewildered.
In fact, I have stopped watching the news at 10pm because it is mostly so disturbing that I can’t get to sleep!
And I think that’s the point I’m coming to here today.
If it is upsetting, I don’t engage.
Like I don’t do horror films, or war films, or psycho films – in fact, no violence or head-warp shit whatsoever.
Good grief! There’s enough going on in the real world
without having to reenact it !!!
I don’t do newspapers.
I don’t do late night news.
I don’t do early morning news either,
because I figured out after years of waking up to that argumentative individual John Humphries at 6am each day,
I was out of sorts with the world before I’d even cleaned my teeth!
In other words, I don’t add fuel to my super-sensitive mind.
I don’t feed it negativity.
I’m not saying that I am ignoring the world and what is happening.
Not at all!
But I find that the Guardian Headlines download on my I-Pad
keeps me posted.
Then I can choose whether I want to explore the story more,
expose my photographic mind to distressing pictures or not; whereas when I am watching the TV or scanning a newspaper, BOOM! There’s the photo of that lifeless little boy on the beach which I will carry with me now until the day I die.
Can’t handle it. All too much for this woman.
So I choose to filter what I can digest.
Is that selfish? Don’t know.
It’s a coping mechanism I have put in place to handle Life
and the Bigger Picture.
If something really bad has happened,
I can rest assured my Dad will be on the phone.
He reads the Telegraph from cover to cover every day.
That’s all I wanted to share today.
I can’t control much.
I can contribute where I can.
And I can put measures in place to protect my peace of mind.
So can you.
Love and hugs,